The
saddest thing about this gospel is that they walked away, these people with
stones in their hands. And there’s
pretty stiff competition for the saddest thing about this gospel. There’s the fact that there were going to
stone a woman to death. There’s their
desire to test Jesus. There’s the
possibility that an act of adultery had been occurring, and we have to stand
back and also be just as saddened, nay outraged, that we don’t know who
consented to what in this encounter.
There is a lot to lament in this Gospel, about this happening retold to
us, and about people and events in our lives whose memories it evokes. But, I still contend that the saddest thing
about this gospel is that they walked away, these people with stones in their
hands.
Of
course, I don’t mean that it would sadden me less if they had cast those stone,
if they had added murderous defilement of human life to the sins of their
hearts. No, it saddens me that they didn’t
drop their stones and go to Jesus. And
what gives me hope, what gladdens my heart, what excites me to strive for
holiness, what allows me to proclaim this as gospel, as good news: is this
woman, that she stays. And unlike these
people with stones in their hands, who desert, who flee, who cannot bear to be
in the presence of the one who has convicted them of their sins, she is sent.
All
depart, but only she is sent by Christ.
Only she leaves having been raised up, head held high to gaze in wonder,
love and awe at the lofty grandeur of mercy incarnate; they skulk away, with
heads bowed, made lower. And that still
saddens me. If I’d have been writing
this story, they would have dropped their stones and gone to Jesus for healing,
and been sent and done wondrous things in his name. I didn’t write that story; but, I can help
write a new story, we can help write a new story: a story in which sinners
never skulk away but come to Jesus and are sent out with heads held high. Lament can become fuel for zeal. And if we want to invite others to God’s
mercy we have to start by encountering it for ourselves.
Throughout
our lives, and maybe particularly in this season of Lent, we find ourselves
convicted of our sins and experience compunction. And however God uses the created order to
show us that, it is the Spirit who convicts, who shows us the stones in our
hands, that we don’t know how they got there; or the stones a stone’s throw
away from us, that in our heart of hearts we did not want to hurl, but we
did. And I don’t want to homogenize all
sin, to say that all sin is equally deadly or equally vicious. But all sin is sin, and what I long for is
for us each to drop it, but not skulk away; instead, to come to Jesus and leave
sent.
These
past few Lents, I’ve made part of my fasting to fast from taking the best
available parking space, to try and train myself to think humbly of others as
more important than myself, to recognize that someone else has heavier bags, a
tighter schedule, or more fatigue in their bones. I’ve found the main value of this fasting has
been to show me quite how bad at it I am.
How often my autopilot spidey-sense parking spot finder just locates me,
right there next to the store, avoiding only the disabled parking spots (out of
fear of a ticket, not love for the disabled).
And, then I start to justify staying there to myself, “well, it would be
a waste of gas to move now,” and this year I can even footnote my excuse with Laudato Si’, and skulk away from trying
to drop the stone of selfishness.
Here, in
this place, in this Mass, we do not skulk away.
We don’t just leave right after the penitential act. We acknowledge our sins, we profess our
longing to drop our stones, and then we stay, and we hear the words of
everlasting life. We have our tender,
intimate encounter with Jesus. We pray,
through the priest’s prayer that precedes the sign of peace, that God would not
look upon our sins, but upon the faith of the Church. And we trust that He is faithful in answering
that prayer. I’ve found that as I pray
it in our name, I can’t help but briefly do what I’m asking God to do, and look
over the congregation marveling at the faith of the Church, tasting for a brief
moment what it means to look without judgment.
And then we’re sent. “Go.” “Go in peace, glorifying the Lord by your
life.”
We are
sent, with the woman who was sent. We
are sent to seek those who skulked away and invite them to this wondrous going
forth, this pilgrimage together to holiness.
We are sent to seek those with stones still in their hands, and invite
them on the same journey. It’s a journey
in response to that upward calling of which St. Paul wrote, being raised to
walk with heads held high because we gaze with love and longing at what lies
ahead, and with arms outstretched to beckon others to join us on the way
because we want to share that with them.
And it
is hard. It does require straining
forward. But, we’re not journeying under
our own steam. Our reading from the book
of Isaiah proclaims how God acts to create that way for us: that paths are
forged in seas; deserts are watered; wild beasts made not just benign, but
devout. All this that we might come to
our goal; that we, the people God formed for Himself, might announce his
praise.
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