Jesus looks at us – John 16:20-23

Friday of the 6th week of Easter; St. Joseph parish.

She was scared to be left alone with him.  My friend Abi recently had her first child, a beautiful baby boy named Jack, and she shared with me during the pregnancy what her greatest anxiety was – it wasn’t how her and her husband would cope with the huge changes to come in their lives, it wasn’t sleepless nights, it wasn’t labor; it was that first time after the birth that she would be left alone the baby.  How would she know what to do?  Of course, that time eventually came.  After the birth, once she had come home from the hospital, and friends and family had left, after a while her husband had to leave too go to the store.  She took a deep breath to try and calm her nerves, and then looked down at the impossibly precious bundle in her arms.  Jack looked back at her.  He couldn’t smile yet, but he could look with love.  At that moment, Abi felt no anxiety, only joy.

In that moment, she understood the surprising good news that Jesus had for his disciples in the upper room and has for us today.  While we may want to see Jesus (and I hope we do), what gives joy to our hearts is that Jesus will see us.  He says, “I will see you and your hearts will rejoice.”

Do we long for that searching loving gaze?  Do we prepare for it now, by showing him our all in our prayer?  Do we show the good, so as he can see gifts given to be handed on?  Do we trust that he can take it when we show our pain and lament, so as he can see our wounds that match his? Do we trust in his love to show our failings, our temptations and our wrong-doings, so as he can see what to forgive to send us out into the world as agents of forgiveness?

Having Christ born in us is scary.  That kind of honesty involves serious labor pains.  It leads to that look of love.  It leads to joy.